Sunday, November 13, 2011
In need of Angels
Grace. I love you and I miss you. And right now I need you. And your friends. And not just for me but for so many people down here. There has been too much heartache in the past week for too many families. It's not right and it's not fair and it just really stinks! Please surround us all with your love and protection and help us to get through this too. I love you baby girl!
Sunday, October 30, 2011
Top 10 lessons this weekend/birthday party (and all by 2:00 on Sunday)
10 - This year's flu vaccine will give Keven the flu - fever, chills, sweats and all
9 - Buy bowls when Chris is bringing his delicious homemade ice cream
8 - Remember to replace battery in doorbell before the party so it works when people arrive
7 - Be sure to refill the chip bowl so people will keep eating all the queso
6 - Take more pictures
5- Don't put the men in charge of the gift opening if you want a list of who brought what gift
4 - Buy fly paper when having a backyard party with the door open
3 - Keep the bounce house over night so you can jump off some of the calories from the party the day before
2 - Camden needs a sibling to play with the day after his party when I'm too exhausted to play any more
1 - Don't tell a 4 year old to let you rest for 10 minutes and point to a digital clock and tell him what numbers to watch for to know when those 10 minutes are up. He will then tell you continuously when the numbers change to the next one and then talk about how they look like different numbers depending on how you look at them and...
The 2 things that make all that and more worthwhile -
"That was a fun party mom!" and "I like being 4" :)
I sure love that boy!
9 - Buy bowls when Chris is bringing his delicious homemade ice cream
8 - Remember to replace battery in doorbell before the party so it works when people arrive
7 - Be sure to refill the chip bowl so people will keep eating all the queso
6 - Take more pictures
5- Don't put the men in charge of the gift opening if you want a list of who brought what gift
4 - Buy fly paper when having a backyard party with the door open
3 - Keep the bounce house over night so you can jump off some of the calories from the party the day before
2 - Camden needs a sibling to play with the day after his party when I'm too exhausted to play any more
1 - Don't tell a 4 year old to let you rest for 10 minutes and point to a digital clock and tell him what numbers to watch for to know when those 10 minutes are up. He will then tell you continuously when the numbers change to the next one and then talk about how they look like different numbers depending on how you look at them and...
The 2 things that make all that and more worthwhile -
"That was a fun party mom!" and "I like being 4" :)
I sure love that boy!
Saturday, October 22, 2011
Is all that we see or seem but a dream within a dream?
Edgar Allan Poe.
Dreams are an interesting and amazing thing.
"I have a dream..."
"A dream is a wish your heart makes..."
"Dream weaver" :)
There are so many different types of dreams. Dreams for yourself...what you want out of life. Things you hope to do and see and be part of. What do you want to be when you grow up? What's on your bucket list?
Dreams for your children...what will they do when they grow up? What interests will they have? What will they look like and be like?
The dreams we're all embarrassed to have...dreams of wealth, power, beauty, fame...
And then what are dreams anyways? You can't touch them, smell them, feel them...You can't guarantee they'll happen. And then when they don't happen...you're crushed. You can control up to a point but when the dreams are snatched away there isn't anything you can do. Sometimes they slowly fade away as we grasp at everything we can to try and hold onto them.
What started all this with dreams? The very weird dream I had last night. And that's another type of dream. The ones of our subconscious. The ones we have no control over and then try to sort out and make sense of. Are they things our mind think of and we're afraid to see except when we're asleep? Or is it someone/something trying to speak to us? Or is it residual of things we've seen/heard/done during the day. I find the subconscious interesting. Something we can't control...has a "mind" of it's own.
So, I know...you're curious about the dream. It was very odd. I was in NYC with family and friends. That's not odd...been there done that. [Get to again in April ;)] We sat down to eat and one friend kept asking to borrow things. I would give them and we'd keep eating. But then they asked for something I didn't have with me. It was back at the hotel. So, I said I would go get it. Off I went by myself to get back to the hotel and get this item. I was going to meet them at the underground mall in an hour for the half off sale. Sounds pretty normal so far...but then when I went to get the stuff I was driving Grace's power chair. I didn't need it, perfectly capable of walking or taking a cab or whatever, but there I was driving her power chair up and down the streets of New York. (She did like New York - and the subways). Then I got lost on some side streets - couldn't figure out where the hotel was. Kept wondering, trying to figure out where to go. Started walking, well riding the chair, with some teenager. Then there was an amusement park next to us. But it only had 2 roller coasters and nothing else. We got to a part of the street where we had to go down, so I was going to take the elevator. By this point I was making it clear to people I didn't need the chair, but that was the easiest way to transport it. Just to drive it - those things are heavy when you try to push them. So we get in the elevator and then it was more like a vehicle. There were several of us in there...waiting, not moving....I was of course irritated that we weren't going anywhere. I had a place to be! Some military personnel got on and we were all just waiting. Then some bad people got on. They were military from another country. They started with the officer of our military - started beating him. Then the other military people. The 2 ladies next to me decided they were going to try and sneak away...I tried to tell them they shouldn't..they got out and were immediately grabbed. I was next. They grabbed me. Picked me up as I was kicking and screaming and begging them to stop. They turned me like a battling ram and were running about to run me head on into a wall and I woke up. WHAT????
What in the world is all that?? I watched sitcoms before I fell asleep. It doesn't make any sense to me what so ever.
So, dreams. Extremely powerful. They drive us...what we want, what we see. They slow us down...when we're not sure what they are or our next step. They give us hope and desires. And they crush us at times. Just so incredibly interesting.
"Is all that we see or seem but a dream within a dream?"
Dreams are an interesting and amazing thing.
"I have a dream..."
"A dream is a wish your heart makes..."
"Dream weaver" :)
There are so many different types of dreams. Dreams for yourself...what you want out of life. Things you hope to do and see and be part of. What do you want to be when you grow up? What's on your bucket list?
Dreams for your children...what will they do when they grow up? What interests will they have? What will they look like and be like?
The dreams we're all embarrassed to have...dreams of wealth, power, beauty, fame...
And then what are dreams anyways? You can't touch them, smell them, feel them...You can't guarantee they'll happen. And then when they don't happen...you're crushed. You can control up to a point but when the dreams are snatched away there isn't anything you can do. Sometimes they slowly fade away as we grasp at everything we can to try and hold onto them.
What started all this with dreams? The very weird dream I had last night. And that's another type of dream. The ones of our subconscious. The ones we have no control over and then try to sort out and make sense of. Are they things our mind think of and we're afraid to see except when we're asleep? Or is it someone/something trying to speak to us? Or is it residual of things we've seen/heard/done during the day. I find the subconscious interesting. Something we can't control...has a "mind" of it's own.
So, I know...you're curious about the dream. It was very odd. I was in NYC with family and friends. That's not odd...been there done that. [Get to again in April ;)] We sat down to eat and one friend kept asking to borrow things. I would give them and we'd keep eating. But then they asked for something I didn't have with me. It was back at the hotel. So, I said I would go get it. Off I went by myself to get back to the hotel and get this item. I was going to meet them at the underground mall in an hour for the half off sale. Sounds pretty normal so far...but then when I went to get the stuff I was driving Grace's power chair. I didn't need it, perfectly capable of walking or taking a cab or whatever, but there I was driving her power chair up and down the streets of New York. (She did like New York - and the subways). Then I got lost on some side streets - couldn't figure out where the hotel was. Kept wondering, trying to figure out where to go. Started walking, well riding the chair, with some teenager. Then there was an amusement park next to us. But it only had 2 roller coasters and nothing else. We got to a part of the street where we had to go down, so I was going to take the elevator. By this point I was making it clear to people I didn't need the chair, but that was the easiest way to transport it. Just to drive it - those things are heavy when you try to push them. So we get in the elevator and then it was more like a vehicle. There were several of us in there...waiting, not moving....I was of course irritated that we weren't going anywhere. I had a place to be! Some military personnel got on and we were all just waiting. Then some bad people got on. They were military from another country. They started with the officer of our military - started beating him. Then the other military people. The 2 ladies next to me decided they were going to try and sneak away...I tried to tell them they shouldn't..they got out and were immediately grabbed. I was next. They grabbed me. Picked me up as I was kicking and screaming and begging them to stop. They turned me like a battling ram and were running about to run me head on into a wall and I woke up. WHAT????
What in the world is all that?? I watched sitcoms before I fell asleep. It doesn't make any sense to me what so ever.
So, dreams. Extremely powerful. They drive us...what we want, what we see. They slow us down...when we're not sure what they are or our next step. They give us hope and desires. And they crush us at times. Just so incredibly interesting.
"Is all that we see or seem but a dream within a dream?"
Thursday, September 1, 2011
How much ache can one heart take
Hearts are quite the amazing organ. It keeps working after it's broken. And what I can't believe is that it can keep breaking. Isn't there some point where the heart can't break any more? I know, random question. Let me back up. A family just lost their 2 month old baby boy. They are an amazing couple and wonderful and my heart breaks for them. I attended the memorial today...at my church with my minister...1st funeral service at my church with my minister and for a child...that I've been to since Grace. It just ripped that scab right off my heart and all the pain came flooding back in. That hard time breathing, that ache in the chest and in the gut. It just hurts so bad. And then hurts extra b/c it's hurting for the family b/c unfortunately I can imagine the pain they feel. People say to me all the time they can't imagine what it must be like, what it feels like, how I do it, etc...I don't want people to imagine or understand. It hurts too much and I don't wish that on anyone. So to know it happens again...it just hurst and makes it fresh all over again. And in the same week we've had 2 more SMA diagnosis in Texas - breaking for those families that are realizing their worlds just got turned upside down like they never thought possible. One of BF had a miscarriage, which breaks my heart and starts all the why questions again. And the it's not fair thoughts again. My brother had to put his cat down (I know not quite the same but we'll just pile it on there). All this week. All on that little heart muscle. How does it keep going when it is so heavy and broken in so many pieces? And then I feel ridiculous for feeling so hurt b/c none of those losses are even mine. How selfish of me to be so upset by all of them when it's not even me. It's them. They are going through it, not me.
Nothing makes sense. Nothing. Chaos. If they are lessons to be learned I'm tired of learning. If what doesn't kill us only makes us stronger I'm strong enough. If God only gives us what we can handle I'd like him to trust me a little less. And at the same time I want to do more. I want to be more available. I want to help more people. But how do you do that when it breaks your heart every time too? I just don't know...no answers...just pain and questions....
Nothing makes sense. Nothing. Chaos. If they are lessons to be learned I'm tired of learning. If what doesn't kill us only makes us stronger I'm strong enough. If God only gives us what we can handle I'd like him to trust me a little less. And at the same time I want to do more. I want to be more available. I want to help more people. But how do you do that when it breaks your heart every time too? I just don't know...no answers...just pain and questions....
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
From a book I'm reading. It's talking about God's Grace, but it fits my Grace too (who is also God's Grace) - "Grace is the delivery of a jewel that nobody ordered, a burst of light in a room where everyone forgot it was dark."
5 years ago today my Angel returned to Heaven. I’m so thankful I had her as longs as I did. But miss her like crazy. Just as much today as ever. I’ve been reading old entries of mine and they still hold so true. The dates could easily be changed for today’s date and 5 years. So instead of writing it all again here’s a few old posts that are so true! Don’t want to read it all? The bottom line is I love Grace, am thankful for her and miss her! Also very thankful to have her little brother here with us. He too is Amazing!
Thursday, September 14, 2006
Four weeks. Four weeks. Can't believe it's been four weeks. Sometimes it seems already four weeks and other times like only four weeks. I just can't believe that four weeks ago today you left us. You were so excited that morning when you woke up. I told you we were going to see Hannah. You were excited. You couldn't wait to go...kept saying bye so we would leave. You spilled your football juice on the floor but I knew before I handed you the cup that you would. :) I miss you so much. I still feel so much guilt and coulda, woulda's....I would do anything for you..even now...I wish I could turn back time...If I could just have that one day to do over again I would do it differently. I love you so much. When you left so did my heart and soul. I know you have lots of friends and family up there. I'm sure you and Sister Mac are having a great time, eating lots of ice cream and going on walks. But it sure is hard for us down here. You will always be my baby girl. I LOVE YOU!!
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
Two months. Two months today. Part of me feels like that was just yesterday and part of me feels like it was a lifetime ago. I guess it's both. It was definitely a different lifetime. It's not the same any more. Never will be again. Nothing has gotten easier. We miss you and love you so much. Pop and I are hanging in there. Thank goodness we have each other. We are blessed to have all the other friends and family we have too, but thank goodness we have each other. I love you sunshine. Always have, always will. Butterfly Kisses up to Heaven for you!!!
Friday, October 27, 2006
The fog still hasn't lifted. I move, I walk, I talk, but it is all automatic. There is little feeling. Sometimes the fog lifts and the feelings rush in. Then, all I can do is cry. It seems the only time I am real, reacting honestly, without guarding every word or look, I start to cry. When the fog lifts for a brief moment, it's as though someone just kicked me in the stomach. As I am reeling with the pain, my mind registers the core prevailing thought: Grace is gone. Grace is gone. When I can't stand the pain anymore, my mind goes back into neutral, back into the fog.
Friday, December 29, 2006
I just don't understand. It's just all so unfair. Why can mean, bad, corrupt, murderous people live for years and decades...and precious innocent Angels...you, Morgan, Kaitlin, Cole, Nathan, Sydney, Braden.. and so many more...are taken way too soon! It's just not fair and I don't understand! What I do know is I love you and miss you. You were amazing from the day we knew you were to be part of our lives. You changed us forever and will never be forgotten. I wish I could hold you again. I hope you are up there picking out the perfect little brother or sister for yourself. Nobody can ever replace you but hopefully we can share our love with another little one. Please tell them all about everyone down here and how much they are loved already. Tell them to call us Ada and Pop...and that their first word should be Poop :) I hope you are eating tons of mashed potatoes, ice cream, chocolate and juice. I hope you are happy. I love you and I miss you!
Saturday, January 13, 2007
I miss you so much. I hurt so much. I just want to hold you and kiss you. I want you to pull my hair and laugh about it. I want you to say "poop". You were the most perfect little girl in the world. I just don't understand and it's just not fair. I would do anything in the world for you. I would do anything in the world to be with you again. I love you so much and I miss you so much!
I have so many emotions about all of this. I'm scared to have another baby. I want one like crazy...have since before you were born...but I'm scared. Scared I won't love them enough...that I won't feel the same about them as you....that I will lose them too....that I won't be able to hold onto them because they will have so much strength and wiggle and squirm like you never did....scared that they will have SMA and I will have to lose another precious angel. I'm also scared that this won't work at all and we won't be pregnant. I'm not sure our hearts can handle that. And I don't really want to learn if they can or not. I'm also excited at the thought of having another little one...of having a baby to hold and love...of telling her little brother or sister all about you and how special you are and how lucky they are to have such a wonderful guardian angel as a big sister.
I have been lost since losing you. I was your mother. For once my life had importance and made since. I love being Pop's wife but he can do without me. You couldn't. I love you so much and felt the role of mother was my calling in life. I have felt so useless and not needed and just lost without you. No meaning for me. I'm ready to continue being a mom
August 17, 2011 - we still miss you Angel. I love you as much as ever. Thank you for sending us your wonderful little brother and watching over him so well. He will make you proud I know. I hope we do too. Love you then, now and always!
5 years ago today my Angel returned to Heaven. I’m so thankful I had her as longs as I did. But miss her like crazy. Just as much today as ever. I’ve been reading old entries of mine and they still hold so true. The dates could easily be changed for today’s date and 5 years. So instead of writing it all again here’s a few old posts that are so true! Don’t want to read it all? The bottom line is I love Grace, am thankful for her and miss her! Also very thankful to have her little brother here with us. He too is Amazing!
Thursday, September 14, 2006
Four weeks. Four weeks. Can't believe it's been four weeks. Sometimes it seems already four weeks and other times like only four weeks. I just can't believe that four weeks ago today you left us. You were so excited that morning when you woke up. I told you we were going to see Hannah. You were excited. You couldn't wait to go...kept saying bye so we would leave. You spilled your football juice on the floor but I knew before I handed you the cup that you would. :) I miss you so much. I still feel so much guilt and coulda, woulda's....I would do anything for you..even now...I wish I could turn back time...If I could just have that one day to do over again I would do it differently. I love you so much. When you left so did my heart and soul. I know you have lots of friends and family up there. I'm sure you and Sister Mac are having a great time, eating lots of ice cream and going on walks. But it sure is hard for us down here. You will always be my baby girl. I LOVE YOU!!
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
Two months. Two months today. Part of me feels like that was just yesterday and part of me feels like it was a lifetime ago. I guess it's both. It was definitely a different lifetime. It's not the same any more. Never will be again. Nothing has gotten easier. We miss you and love you so much. Pop and I are hanging in there. Thank goodness we have each other. We are blessed to have all the other friends and family we have too, but thank goodness we have each other. I love you sunshine. Always have, always will. Butterfly Kisses up to Heaven for you!!!
Friday, October 27, 2006
The fog still hasn't lifted. I move, I walk, I talk, but it is all automatic. There is little feeling. Sometimes the fog lifts and the feelings rush in. Then, all I can do is cry. It seems the only time I am real, reacting honestly, without guarding every word or look, I start to cry. When the fog lifts for a brief moment, it's as though someone just kicked me in the stomach. As I am reeling with the pain, my mind registers the core prevailing thought: Grace is gone. Grace is gone. When I can't stand the pain anymore, my mind goes back into neutral, back into the fog.
Friday, December 29, 2006
I just don't understand. It's just all so unfair. Why can mean, bad, corrupt, murderous people live for years and decades...and precious innocent Angels...you, Morgan, Kaitlin, Cole, Nathan, Sydney, Braden.. and so many more...are taken way too soon! It's just not fair and I don't understand! What I do know is I love you and miss you. You were amazing from the day we knew you were to be part of our lives. You changed us forever and will never be forgotten. I wish I could hold you again. I hope you are up there picking out the perfect little brother or sister for yourself. Nobody can ever replace you but hopefully we can share our love with another little one. Please tell them all about everyone down here and how much they are loved already. Tell them to call us Ada and Pop...and that their first word should be Poop :) I hope you are eating tons of mashed potatoes, ice cream, chocolate and juice. I hope you are happy. I love you and I miss you!
Saturday, January 13, 2007
I miss you so much. I hurt so much. I just want to hold you and kiss you. I want you to pull my hair and laugh about it. I want you to say "poop". You were the most perfect little girl in the world. I just don't understand and it's just not fair. I would do anything in the world for you. I would do anything in the world to be with you again. I love you so much and I miss you so much!
I have so many emotions about all of this. I'm scared to have another baby. I want one like crazy...have since before you were born...but I'm scared. Scared I won't love them enough...that I won't feel the same about them as you....that I will lose them too....that I won't be able to hold onto them because they will have so much strength and wiggle and squirm like you never did....scared that they will have SMA and I will have to lose another precious angel. I'm also scared that this won't work at all and we won't be pregnant. I'm not sure our hearts can handle that. And I don't really want to learn if they can or not. I'm also excited at the thought of having another little one...of having a baby to hold and love...of telling her little brother or sister all about you and how special you are and how lucky they are to have such a wonderful guardian angel as a big sister.
I have been lost since losing you. I was your mother. For once my life had importance and made since. I love being Pop's wife but he can do without me. You couldn't. I love you so much and felt the role of mother was my calling in life. I have felt so useless and not needed and just lost without you. No meaning for me. I'm ready to continue being a mom
August 17, 2011 - we still miss you Angel. I love you as much as ever. Thank you for sending us your wonderful little brother and watching over him so well. He will make you proud I know. I hope we do too. Love you then, now and always!
Sunday, August 14, 2011
More Camdenisms and Summer Remorse
I knew I wouldn't remember all of Camden's cute sayings. So here's a few more and a funny story.Grink = drink
skrike=strike
gump = jump
kips = chips
mazagine = magazine
Top on = on top of. IE: "What's top on the car?" - What's on top of the car?
Beat up = beat. IE: eating dinner he finished his food first "Look mom I beat you up"
He is fighting bed time - has been for a few weeks. Just will NOT go to sleep. Tonight's stall tactic - he needs a drink. So he keeps asking for one, no we aren't giving him one and we're doing mostly ignoring. This goes on for quite some time 20/30 minutes. He asks again and Keven tells him "No, b/c if you have a drink now you win and you're not going to win" so of course he says "Yes, I want to win!" Still no drink. So more and more of this whining and wanting a drink and ignoring. Then a bit later "Hey mom? When dad goes to bed can you get me a drink?" :) Good thing he was in the other room so he didn't see us cracking up laughing. Still not asleep. Still needs a drink. His last try was about 10:15 when he asked if we were going to bed soon and we said yes and he said he'd get a drink after we both went to bed. Hmmmm...we shall see I suppose :)
Summer remorse - kind of like buyers remorse. Where did this summer go?!!! Why did I not get done a fraction of what I hoped to this summer??!! I had a good summer. Went on a couple of trips. Spent a lot of time with my wonderful boy, Camden. But that to-do list just didn't get to-done. That exercise and weight loss never took off. I've enjoyed being lazy and playing way too much. My piles around the house haven't gotten much smaller. I'm not ready to go back to work tomorrow! I'm not ready to wake up to the alarm clock instead of Camden kissing my cheek :) I'm not ready to be away from my boy for over 9 hours a day. I know, I'm lucky, I have the summer off (granted any teacher can tell you it's much needed and deserved - for students and teachers alike) But it's so hard to go back. To see all the stuff I didn't get done this summer. I know...negative nancy...cheer up. It'll be fine and good and life goes on. But it just feels like summer remorse and I had to let it out :)
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Camdenisms
August Depression has reared its ugly head and completely sunk it’s teeth into me. No good! I just want to crawl into a cave full of chocolate, coke and fried food and drool as I flip channels aimlessly on the TV. So, to try and counteract that I thought I would reflect upon some Camdenisms. :) Things/words Camden says that we love the way he says them. Or little stories that have tickled us. It’ll be good documentation for him too. I’ll start with his word and then translate. :) See how many I can remember.
Flou Ball/Flou tip = Foul Ball/Foul Tip
Nuffin = Nothing
Sumpen = Something
Mr. Kratz = Mr. Pratz
Ms. Alinda = Ms. Melinda
Riv Room = Living Room
Agamas (hard G)= Pajamas
Gen (hard G) = Jen
Driving down the road…”Why does daddy know how to drive fast?” Me “Because he’s a male” Camo “Why is he a male” Me “Because of his chromosomes” Snickering from the back seat – “Chromosomes, that’s a funny word”
Camo “What kind of car does God drive?” Me “I don’t know” Camo “We can just look it up on-line”
He wanted to watch a movie in my car - I don't have a player. He said Marmee has one in her car why I don't have one. I said I'm not as cool as Marmee. He said Is Marmee cool? I said yup. He asked if he was cool. I said yup. He said if he's cool then I should have one in my car for him. Uh oh...
Me: Do you need to go potty before we leave? Camo: Why? Was I doing the potty dance?
At a later date he was moving around and I asked if he needed to go to the bathroom. His response – No, I wasn’t doing the potty dance I was just moving. See I was doing this…the potty dance is like this…
Deep thoughts..."My God made bathrooms all around the world. If 1 is locked we can just go to another. That's awesome".
Miss IncrediGirl = Mrs. Incredible (from the Incredibles)
On a ride at Disney he was standing up. We asked him to sit down and he asked why. Because you need to be safe and have a seat. No, but I just standing up. :) Goober!
He’s been talking a lot about Grace lately and asking lots of questions about her. It’s so bittersweet. I’m glad he is though. He’s been asking a lot about God too. I don’t know if it’s because it’s August so she’s around even more…or if it’s because he’s getting older and trying to understand/comprehend…I think it’s both. He asked the other day what was on top of my leg – I finally figured out he was talking about the knee cap. He asked me why we had those – to help us move our legs. So he started moving his and asked if Grace moved hers too. We’ve talked about her disease and her chair and everything. I told him she tried and she could do it pretty well in the water. He liked that.
Because I had told him God was around us all the time he later asked why God was so big. And was he nice and why is he nice. He’s asked why Grace had a disease, why did she die.
“I love you mom. You’re a good mommy. You’re a cute little girl”
I know he has said a lot more cute things but that’s all I can think of for now. I love that boy. And his big sister too!
Flou Ball/Flou tip = Foul Ball/Foul Tip
Nuffin = Nothing
Sumpen = Something
Mr. Kratz = Mr. Pratz
Ms. Alinda = Ms. Melinda
Riv Room = Living Room
Agamas (hard G)= Pajamas
Gen (hard G) = Jen
Driving down the road…”Why does daddy know how to drive fast?” Me “Because he’s a male” Camo “Why is he a male” Me “Because of his chromosomes” Snickering from the back seat – “Chromosomes, that’s a funny word”
Camo “What kind of car does God drive?” Me “I don’t know” Camo “We can just look it up on-line”
He wanted to watch a movie in my car - I don't have a player. He said Marmee has one in her car why I don't have one. I said I'm not as cool as Marmee. He said Is Marmee cool? I said yup. He asked if he was cool. I said yup. He said if he's cool then I should have one in my car for him. Uh oh...
Me: Do you need to go potty before we leave? Camo: Why? Was I doing the potty dance?
At a later date he was moving around and I asked if he needed to go to the bathroom. His response – No, I wasn’t doing the potty dance I was just moving. See I was doing this…the potty dance is like this…
Deep thoughts..."My God made bathrooms all around the world. If 1 is locked we can just go to another. That's awesome".
Miss IncrediGirl = Mrs. Incredible (from the Incredibles)
On a ride at Disney he was standing up. We asked him to sit down and he asked why. Because you need to be safe and have a seat. No, but I just standing up. :) Goober!
He’s been talking a lot about Grace lately and asking lots of questions about her. It’s so bittersweet. I’m glad he is though. He’s been asking a lot about God too. I don’t know if it’s because it’s August so she’s around even more…or if it’s because he’s getting older and trying to understand/comprehend…I think it’s both. He asked the other day what was on top of my leg – I finally figured out he was talking about the knee cap. He asked me why we had those – to help us move our legs. So he started moving his and asked if Grace moved hers too. We’ve talked about her disease and her chair and everything. I told him she tried and she could do it pretty well in the water. He liked that.
Because I had told him God was around us all the time he later asked why God was so big. And was he nice and why is he nice. He’s asked why Grace had a disease, why did she die.
“I love you mom. You’re a good mommy. You’re a cute little girl”
I know he has said a lot more cute things but that’s all I can think of for now. I love that boy. And his big sister too!
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